Out of the Wilderness: Chapter 3
Happy Friday, my friends! I hope it has been a wonderful week for you and your families, no matter the circumstances. We are not defined by our circumstances, but by how we react to them!
There are so many people telling us how to be or to think and I don't want to be one of them... not this week :).
May you seek out the wisdom of God and He will be the one to guide you in all your ways.
May you all be cloaked with the peace of God that surpasses all understanding. The world may judge you and your responses but we are not of this world!
Come together this week with your family and enjoy some quiet time together:)))
Hope you will enjoy this third chapter with Hopeless!
If you are just joining us, please go back and read the previous post to catch up!
Have fun!
Chapter 3
The more he talked, the less I understood him. It’s like he
spoke in code and I just couldn’t crack it with the tools I had at that moment.
I decided to trust him and believe that it all will begin to make sense when
the pieces of the puzzle finally come together for me.
We went out to a field where heavily trodden paths came
together in various formations and patterns. Obstacles lined each path. It
looked like a few people had come before me already.
“Prophet, have you trained other people before me?”
“Many before you.”
“How many?”
“Too many to count. Not enough that have followed through.”
His face became serious and his voice took on a more
definitive, crisp tone.
“Hopeless, you must be prepared for anything and everything,
but remember that nothing is impossible with God. I want you to remember this
when the going gets tough. And another tip... It helps to say to yourself and
out loud, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Use that verse
and you will find strength when you are weak, courage when you are terrified.”
“Who is this God you speak of? And who is this Christ?”
“Enough, we must begin. Promise me that no matter what
happens today, you will not quit.”
I became very frightened and wanted to quit that instant,
but something held me tight to my resolve. “I promise.”
“Alright,” he said. “It is time. You see this path, a
clearly outlined track in front of you? You must stay in your lane, Hopeless.”
He pushed me across the gold line in the grass that seemed
to represent the Starting Point. “Now, you must begin your training! Run! Run,
Hopeless, run!”
I’ve never felt such confusion that overwhelmed me the
instant I stepped into the lane shown to me by the old man. This one seemed
brand new. The blades of grass were fresh, unbruised, filled with promise.
The path seemed so inviting and alive but something in my
spirit felt held back. I could hear the
Prophet scream out in the phantom distance, “Hopeless, keep running! Keep
moving no matter what!”
It was as if all my movements were rooted in slow motion, my
limbs filled with lead and my heart palpitating with dread.
I heard the whispers of the shadows come closer and closer,
grazing my ears, whispering, “You will never get ahead. You will never be
understood. Yes, you are different, but whatever you do will mean nothing.
Therefore, your life is worthless. Why this rush? Where do you think you are
going?”
I almost stopped to ponder these thoughts as I’ve done many
countless times during my travailing of the woods.
The shouts of the old man brought me back to the task at
hand. He screamed out urgently, “Resist them, Hopeless! These are all lies of
the Enemy. Resist them and they will flee!”
My heart began to burn with fire and courage. I used to hide
from these shadows, but they were always so near to me no matter where I went
or where I hid. They persisted to torment me, hour upon hour, each and every
day.
I turned around to face them. Instead of cowering, I found
myself running at them! No longer would I accept their power in my life!
Suddenly, I found myself sitting on top of a silver horse,
in the frontlines of a battle field.
I turned around to see behind me and saw hundreds of
warriors, some on horses and some on foot, waiting, watching me. Their eyes
were full of intent, anticipation and strength. We looked at each other for
what seemed a really long time, but must have been thirty seconds at most, as
one of the horsemen started and finished his short ride to the right of me.
“Mistress, we are awaiting your command! Use your sword to
let us all know when you are ready to attack as the enemy is coming closer and
closer.”
Something inside me snapped into place as I naturally took
on the role of the Commander of the Army. I swung my sword high above my head
and as it began its descent down to my side, at the gesture of pointing it
directly at the enemy, my mouth opened up and a roaring sound came out of the
depths of me that I knew not existed.
I didn’t have time to ponder the majesty and power of that
moment, all I knew was that the moment I let out that sound, the earth quaked
and the mountains shook in the distance. A great wind rested above my troops
and gave us an influx of energy and bravery as we thundered towards the
opposing forces.
The dark line in the distance was no longer a solid line but
soon transformed into a massive army of the most horrifying and ugly creatures
I had ever seen. I’ve seen monsters in the Woods before, but they were never
this clear and sharp, as the darkness tended to cover most of their physical
attributes.
My heart skipped a beat, but I quickly recovered as I
remembered the Prophet’s serious tone as he instructed me to keep going no
matter what.
I was done with Fear. I knew I had to conquer it. This time
around, I was going to be victorious!
I swung my sword high and brought it down upon the first
creature that attempted to bring me down from my saddle and to the ground. I
knew it wanted to trample me with its very thick and stumpy legs.
It had blood all over its legs. It was clear that I wasn’t
its first attempt.
The sword began to sing out scriptures that I’ve never heard
before. It simply turned alive in the battle!
As soon as I made contact with the monster, it turned into a
hologram of my disapproving mother, her face filled with disappointment and
regret, her mouth whispering, “You are not good. You are not good. You are not
good.” Then the hologram shuddered a few times and faded out into nothing.
I was shocked at seeing my mother there on the battlefield,
although I knew it wasn’t truly my mother. I hadn’t seen my mother in many
years. I’d lost her long ago to her stoic religious convictions that separated
us. The walls that were built between us were too high and too thick for any
meaningful communication to take place, and yet, I still longed for her. I
still yearned to hold her close and to understand the little girl inside her.
A push to my left side almost knocked me off my horse. I
turned to face a disturbing man-like creature with the face of a Joker. He
started to laugh at me, his laugh becoming louder and louder, jolting my every
cell, every atom in my body.
Weakness began to come over me as I listened to his terrible
laugh. He began to speak, his voice hoarse, a croaking across the ages, “You
are alone, and nobody cares! You are not worth loving. No one will ever
understand you. You may as well give up and die, you worthless waste of space!
Greatness has never been your portion.”
My heart began to hurt a dull pain, with intermitting
flashes of searing pain coming through every time that the Joker spat into my
face, searing its spit into my flesh.
I was so grateful for what happened next as I lacked the
strength to fight back on my own. The Wind around me intensified to such a
degree that it cocooned me, but like a tornado, it devastated everything
outside the eye of the storm. The Joker’s face, enraged, began to transform
into countless faces that I’ve seen in my life, some from my secular spheres,
others I’ve encountered in my own family, as well as the religious players that
seemed to be more important to my people, who I hoped loved me, than me.
The creature began to lose its power as it twisted in the
powerful Wind, completely turning into a dark grey hologram, and then spiraling
into nothing, just a handful of ashes that quickly fell to the ground. The
mysterious Wind instantly became still.
A hush and a calmness went over the land.
I looked up into the sky when I heard a beautiful reciting
of the verse I’ve heard since I was a child, but which never rang as true as it
did at that moment.
The reciting was done by many beautiful and strange creatures,
amidst which appeared to be angels of various sizes and rank.
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten
Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life”
(John 3:16).
I looked down at the tugging of my robe. That was the first
time I actually noticed my clothing! A beautiful fuchsia tunic, outlined in
gold, draped across my body. It wasn’t long, maybe a little past my knees. My
gaze went down to my sandals. They weren’t a specific color, but a multitude of
colors, a rainbow of colors, and some others were seen by me for the first time
in my life.
As my gaze began to rest on my intruder, I almost jumped out
of my saddle! It was Joy! What was she doing here?
She was holding out a golden cup, telling me to drink. As I
drank that liquid gold aromatic potion, the scent of victory and joy, faith and
hope began to fill my nostrils and every crevasse in my body. I could taste and
smell these feelings and emotions. Life began to course through my spirit and
flesh at a greater degree.
“You are worthy because He deemed you worthy of the greatest
sacrifice. You are loved and will be forever loved,” she quipped, took the cup
back and disappeared into the wind.
After Joy left, my body refreshed and restored, I began to
pay attention more closely to what was happening around me.
I became aware of the pained cries and sobbing coming at me
from multiple directions. I was in the center of the most thick and active
battle I have ever seen or imagined before.
While I was so consumed by my own personal battles, I’ve
lost track or sight of where I was. I wasn’t alone, but surrounded by many of
my own, the people that followed me, and now they were so engrossed in their
own personal battles, hardly anyone was free to help anyone else.
There was so much suffering. I could smell fresh blood on
the ground. The Earth began to moan and groan and cry out, “Children of God,
when will you come into the position of authority and identity you were given
by God, through Jesus Christ? How long must creation suffer? When will we be
free from this bondage?”
It was then that something came over me, a power I’ve never
felt before began to course through my being, a fire that consumed my fear and
selfishness. I was left with nothing but this deep desire to fight on behalf of
everyone as far as the eye could see.
I jumped down from my horse and set her free. I knew I
needed to be on foot, close and personal with many that were thrown off from
their horses. Some were on their knees, exhausted, preparing to exhale their
last breath.
I saw a young man, handsome and strong, quaking at the sight
of his enemy, a large, disproportional manlike creature with arms twice the
length of its height. The arms were slowly encircling the man, getting ready to
squeeze the life out of him. At any other time, I would have been helpless to assist
him but the refreshing drink of Life I’ve just received made me feel
invincible.
A scripture came to
my mind that I began to shout out as I raised my sword, “Nothing is impossible
with God! Do not believe the lies, young man! You can fight back! Fight back,
NOW! Raise your sword!”
I swung mine and cut off one of the arms at the root.
The creature’s scream tore through the atmosphere like
thunder, “Why do you care about this man? He is weak and useless. He would
never help you. Go and worry about your own affairs.”
I refused to answer him.
It was then that I noticed the arm turn into a snake which
began to encircle around me. I had to decide to either save myself or the man,
who was too scared to raise his sword. I swung mine, but the distraction of the
snake made me miscalculate and I only grazed the second arm. Darkish green
liquid began to ooze out from the inflicted wound, and yet, the man was still
standing, frozen, paralyzed.
I gritted my teeth in frustration. Just my luck, I thought.
No good deed goes unpunished.
The snake lunged at my face and stopped a few inches away
from me, its eyes locked in on mine. It began to speak in a hissing whisper,
“Let them all go. No one matters but you. Get off this battlefield. Let them
all go to hell. You are too important to die here.”
I began to feel very sleepy, very tired and very devoid of
emotion. Lack of care and concern descended over me. I made the decision to
take the easy way out.
I was too tired. Why should I care about others if they
don’t even dare to care about me? Anyway, they are too weak and too far gone.
What’s the use?
It was then that I fell asleep.
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